Jack Frost has been painting the rooftops and bare branches - he has covered each blade of grass on the lawn. The air, even in centrally-heated Signs Cottage has that hard, white feeling that says King Winter is back for a space. Mr. Signs got back in the small hours from a work stint in Romania, his connecting plane in Munich having been delayed a couple of hours. Even though it was one in the morning, he had some hot soup and I ate half a loaf of the sweet Romanian Christmas bread he brought back. I have barely slept, and this is what regularly happens after I have had a short run of nights when I have had proper, substantial amounts of sleep.
Hovering on the edge of waking and sleeping it is strange how the really stupid, small things crowd round as though wanting to mock me with their petty but persistent claims on my attention. Bread sauce niggles about whether or not to make it ahead of time and will there be room in the oven for goosefat roast potatoes as well as vegetable oil. A notch up from this is the Boxing Day lunch where we join with the sister and her family and with the mater and her spouse. There will not be the possibility of getting drunk because a) I can hardly drink a glassful these days, and shouldn't and b) someone will need to drive mater and spouse to and from the gastro-pub lunch venue. On the other hand, there is the distinct possibility that mater and spouse will take umbrage and absent themselves from the occasion. Every way you look at it you lose, Mrs. Robinson. Christmas itself, though, (whether I sleep or not) is going to be good. The Signs children will be with us, is the main thing, and plus they are doing all the cooking. Even so, monkey mind will not be diverted from fretting about bread sauce and potatoes.
Coming up to the end of another year, and it will have been my fourth year of blogging. Whether to continue with this or stop, is a question that has been moving in and out of consciousness. But in my present unslept state it is probably not one I should think about now. And I have to get out of PJs, have a writing morning, collect Son from station - do stuff.
7 comments:
oh don't stop ... well, i hope you won't decide to! Meanwhile - hmm I have never done bread sauce ahead of time - it would go all claggy wouldn't it??
Thanks, FB - I'm just kind of reviewing the situation ahead of new year - as one does.
Bread sauce would unclag with heat I think - like porridge. But I don't know why I fixated on that particular item!
No need to choose, blog or not. Write when you feel like it, don't if you don't. Find a new reason to go on, or wait until a reason presents itself. No need for absolutes, especially in such a hard season.
I have been tired and run-down this week, and am increasingly struck by how such a state prevents rational, calm thought and makes me focus on the unsettling things which scuttle along at the fringes.
I'm in the latter part of my fourth year of blogging too. There have been a number of instances where I felt I could quite easily stop, but I'm sure I would feel the need to start again, to write one of *those* posts, as and when they crop up.
Wishing you well over the festive season.
That feels very true, Zhoen - especially as we are snowed in again.
Trousers, scuttle along at the fringes - that's exactly what they do. But bread sauce? It's a kind of displacement thing I think.
Continue please!
I quietly read your blog and have never commented, but keep coming back for more.
Cusp, I don't feel grumpy about it at all - just mulling over. Mulling. Now there's a nice word.
Beth, how nice that you've looked into comments. I just went and had a look over at your place. Some lovely things you make.
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