Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Rose Garden

Greetings, y'all. Have you missed me? No, well, er - I have missed me. I've been gone into the illest illirium of Illsville. Of course I exaggerate, but if one can't get mileage out of a bit of self-pity in extremis then what's the point of anything, so cut me a bit of slack - thank you. Extremis is not a good place to be, don't go there. I am still in it really, but am snatching a moment between sufferings (even in the depths of hell they allow you that much) to speak to you, so that I don't lose the habit entirely, for if left too long I think the not-blogging can become like the not-phoning-a-friend and in the end one leaves it so long that the very idea becomes an impossibility.

I am going to quote my old grandma again. Sorry, but it is just so worth repeating, I really think it should be everyone's mantra: Be heppy! Things can only get vorse. Ach Mutti (we used to call her Mutti, don't know why, and she wasn't really the maternal type), if I never really heard you then, I hear you now.

M.E. is probably one of the least kinds of fun you can have on earth and the deeper into it you are, the truer this becomes; and then you think of all the other times when, relative to this time, you were still in the land of the functioning moderates and didn't appreciate all the privileges; and then you think of how far it may still be possible to fall, and you see from the corner of your eye M.E. God smirking, as only He can smirk, and hear him singing in your ear: I beg your pardon, I never promised you a rose garden, and you feel yourself falling onto the first level of the pit of despair which, Gawd knows, is the place of mortal sin itself. What to do, Peeps - que faire? Begin a new regime, of course.

I have begun a new regime. It has to do with seemingly boring things like sugar and food intolerances as well as slightly more interesting (though strange) things concerning the potato. Yes, naturally I have been down the road of food intolerance before now, but this time I am doing it differently, and I believe (am telling myself) that by following this new path I am creating a new possibility. It's good to hope. It's essential. And yes, things can always get vorse. But they can get better too, innit.

Say yes for me, please.


Zhoen said...

Enjoy it now while it's not so bad, before it gets worse. And if it gets better, then you have an extra dollop of happy.

Poor dear. I do hope the food changes help.

Fire Bird said...

yes yes yes a thousand times yes.
look forward to hearing more about potatoes in the fullness of time. And actually, yes, I have missed you. Courage!

Reading the Signs said...

Thank you Zhoen. And you are almost right about the Mutti philosophy, but it was more: be happy now - later when everything's gone to pot you'll realise how good you had it.

Fire Bird, I am grateful for the yesses, for as The Good Book says: the prayer of a righteous mensch availeth much.

Believe me, if this thing works out I will be writing odes to the potato and almost everything else.

I haven't had a sniff of anything to do with sugar for a week.

Nicky Reiss said...

Hi 'Reading',

I know you left a comment on my blog a week or so ago, but something went wrong with Blogger, and I wasn't able to publish it. Hope you weren't taking it personally! We called my grandmother "Muppi" - because, apparently, my father was never able to pronounce the 't' in mutti and it stuck...
I'm certain the strict diet is helping me. It's not an instant cure - it took a few (2-3) weeks for the effects to become noticable; however the nausea is almost entirely gone; far less brain fog (still get some); and not feeling so generally sick as before. Still quite a few symptoms left, just so that I don't forget I've got ME. I'm also still seriously low on energy and still need a lot of rest, even though at other times I can do more than I did before. Am now gradually trying to work out what vitamins/supplements I need and will slowly work them into my regime. I use Jodi Bassett's "Treating ME The Basics" as a rough guide ( Highly recommended - though it's taken me a couple of years to read through her work. Good luck!

Cusp said...

Poor Signsie :O( Deffo 'Yes' for you.

Think you should have a chat with Ashy if you're having probs with potatoes. She knows a thing or two about that but she has also found a new supp that is helping her after several years of 'bleurghhh'.

I have also found a supp 'Mindlinx which purports to support the link between gut and brain....first time EVER that I have been able to take L-Glutamine or pro-biotics without any problems. L-Glut has also been v good for duaghter.

DO hope you feel better soon x

PS..totally get the Mutti line...just as my mother-in-law lived.:O)

Angelbrick Truheart said...


and you know, many others.

Have missed you, as it happens, but I think you may have intuited this anyhoo, even without being told.

Extremis can indeed be crap - and I'm sure you'd know better than I do. There are some extremi, granted, which can feel nice but which aren't necessarily good for one. But that's beside the point here. I would totally hate it if you lost the blog-habit and picked up a not-blog habit in the well-known not-phoning-a-friend fashion. Hate it, you know, and I've some cheek to speak as I don't exactly always um you know reply to my guests as quickly as I might and um. But still. Don't be stopping, Schwesterlein, for then things deffo would be getting vorse.


Reading the Signs said...

Hey Nicky - Blogger was totally misbehaving last week - it deleted a post I put up.

I must have a look at that Jodi Bassett section. Have the Hummingbirds site on my sidebar and may even have read it - but can't remember :)

I have come across some very interesting stuff by Kathleen Desmaisons about sugar addiction.

But I'm also very interested in the leaky gut thing and plan to talk this over with a nutritionist soon.

Cuspie, I have no probs (or even porbs) with the spud, thank gawd for I do like them, in fact I'm supposed to have one every night before sleeping to help control the blood sugar thing. But will check out Ashy about the supp - and that other link you gave me. Ta und danke x

Angelbrick - Kyllä? Now that is something new I learned today, and what a totally fabulous language you have thereand as I said to you somewhere else, I will definitely 'come back' as a Finn next incarnation, and probably was one before this one. Yes, when I think about it that makes complete sense. I take it you pronounce it something like killer and plan to substitute this for 'yes' in future.

Cream in your coffee? Killer.

Mwahs abounding and splendours atcha. Must hei me to bed - bad back today, yes, auch noch!

Reading the Signs said...

- but I like jep too and already use it. Spooky! Definitely a past life situation.

A. Truheart said...

"Killer" is actually not bad at all - probably one of the best attempts at it by a non-native I've heard, proving without any shadow of a doubt you've had past lives and ones to come in these climes.

Just to remind you of the lingo you need to re-pick up, a wee ditty for you here to do some karaoke with. I'm also hoping it might shut up the M.E. God - all tongue-tied and shame-faced. Ha. Serves him right, the wanker.


Montag said...

I hope things get better. I think I told you how my allergies disappeared in March... so even sinner like myself can grab a miracle.

Potatoes, eh? I eat a lot of them. Many times we just eat potatoes and greens. I always think of Van Gogh's Potato Eaters, or course, which takes the shine off things a bit.

It is good to see you again.

Reading the Signs said...

Montag, mazeltov about the allergies :)

And yes, well - I'm still here.

Montag said...

Is this the face that launch'd a thousand ships,
and toppled the towers of Illsville?

Digitalesse said...

Hey Signs!

You and me both. I'm still in relapse territory and I think I'm looking at the wrong map trying to get out of this place.

I need to improve my diet. I need to ditch the sugars and fats, I reckon. I've never had dramatic improvements on any diet but I believe that the better you eat, the better your health in the long run.

Wishing you some healing vibes.

Reading the Signs said...

Montag, Montag, ich bin jetzt die Seerauber Jenny. "Und ein Schiff mit acht Segeln ...."

Digi, christ-on-a-bike, what a life, eh? I am quite befuddled with maps - healing vibes appreciated. Ditching the sugar is turning out to be quite a project, will be good to have done it. Every Little Helps :/