Well I thought I had moved into what is euphemistically called a Better Patch, but I might have slithered back a bit. Not actually into the Pit itself, but none of us (I am talking M.E. obviously) wants to be headed in that direction. Still - it helps to put a spin on things. That is probably true for most of us and has the virtue of being good for everyone else as well as oneself. Some might say it is almost a duty. In my church-going days (as a practising-because-I'm-crap-at-it-Christian) I liked the part where the priest said, Lift up your hearts! The congregational response to that is, We lift them to the Lord, but I think just the lifting up in itself is probably good enough, and I bet my best china cake plate that the Lord concurs. I would say that putting a spin is just doing that, really, and very much hope that it doesn't amount to the same thing as Positive Affirmations, which don't engage the heart and are therefore just lies. There is no need to positively affirm anything. Even if you are of the 'Life Is Shit And Then You Die' school, heart-lift is achievable even if it is in spite of rather than because of. Nothing wrong with that.
I recently became Facebook friends with a certain well-known journalist (erstwhile 'hip, young gunslinger' at the NME, to give you a clue). We don't know each other in RL but have a couple of FB friends in common so I took my chances and she is of a generous disposition. There are many things to enjoy about her various writings and pronouncements and, speaking for myself, one can use a bit of vicarious cheer now and then, or even on a daily basis. For a start, she begins each day with Boker TOV, Motekim! which is Hebrew for Good Morning, Darlings! It somehow works particularly well in the Hebrew and gives a small shine to the moment, even when it is followed by a youtube link to a band singing a song one doesn't share an enthusiasm for. As she lives in Brighton and loves eating, drinking and good cheer, I had a fleeting fantasy of meeting up with her at English's Oyster Bar, chewing the gossip plus several courses of delicious things and drinking Black Velvet, which is a champagne and Guiness combo the mater introduced me to at Sheekey's (another fish place) in London. You can't let too much reality bleed into a good fantasy so let us assume that I can still drink tankards full of Black Velvet, that I would not be fazed when we were joined by a group of her sparkly-witty friends, and that when I spoke about how I mostly write about sex and death (with the definite emphasis, these days, on death) I would make it sound like the fun kind. I might also lob in that I was recently long-listed for the National Poetry prize (poem all about someone choosing his coffin), though I suspect that doing this would neither impress nor endear me. In the end, my inner introvert would fuck things up. I would ask the wrong kind of questions - the kind that lead to dark places, as you'd expect of a sex-and-death merchant - and I would wince if the jokes became too cruel. Or it would be nine o'clock and I would suddenly turn into a slipperless M.E. pumpkin. Ah well - fun while it lasted.
But what am I going on about? For this very evening Mr. Signs and I will be going out to a new gastropub eatery recommended by my friend the Cake Lady, in honour of his successfully reaching another milestone in Shrink-training. And also, tomorrow being Mothering Sunday, today is Mother's Eve and a fine and proper time to celebrate. I have already cheated and opened the beautiful card from my daughter, with words that bring a shine to the heart. Sometimes you don't need the spin. It's just all there, and manifest.
Laila tov, motekim.